"I have a job but I want a career"
Chit-chatted with one of my colleagues about our plans when our contract finished this coming November.
He planned to study in French universities next year and has yet to decide what he wanted to major in. I told him about my scholarship application and plan to continue applying for scholarships to Japan and Taiwan. Both of us agreed that if given a better choice, we would leave this job/company of ours.
One thing he said sort of made me thinking, "I have a job now, but I want a career..". Ah.. how apt his description of our current situation.. Yes, we both have a job that pays us every month, but we do not have a career.. Frankly, who in the IT line can truly say that they have a career?? Is being Project Manager a career? System Engineer? Programmer? Developer? What is the next step of being a System Engineer/Developer? Senior System Engineer/Developer? and then what? There is only so many managerial positions in a company, cos you cant have everyone being the manager, then who else will be doing the 'dirty' work?? Every year there are new graduates joining the work force, every year there are IT 'whizs' willing to work at a fraction of the pay but with twice the enthusiasm/effort. With IT outsourcing being the norm, with the influx of cheaper (and some say better) IT service providers from India and China, who wants to engage a local as a permanent IT staff?
Everyone wants to be the next manager, and most are willing to do anything to get it, including back-stabbing and bad-mouthing. 我不想卷入那些勾心斗角、抹黑 、奸诈、阿谀我诈的卑鄙行为。我自认没有高尚的品行，但还是有些事情我是决不会做的。要我说违背良心的奉承话语，对不起，我做不到。也许就因为这样我拒绝了两次晋升的机会，不是因为我能力不足，而是因为我不是搞办公室政治的能手，与其被他人当眼中钉或是在同事之中耍手段，我选择不参与，置身事外。也许你们会觉得我是在逃避，但我觉得自己还未到功夫，‘太极功夫’和‘耍赖神功’还欠缺火候，还必须闭门修炼才能在‘江湖’立足。也许不是我办不到，而是我不想办到。
老实说我现在似乎又再次失去了方向，工作的方向。我真的可以只要“job”而不需要“career”吗？曾经工作代表了我所有的身份，唯一的身份。而今我现在的身份到底是什么？人家的女儿？他人的姐姐？公司的职员？他人的好友？的确有一点迷惘了。我没有一个可以为自己定位的方针。。。我知道这是我必须解开的心结，只有我自己才能解决的难题。也许我太倔强太逞强了，什么事情都想一个人去解决处理，很少向他人求助或问意见，也许吧。。但我始终相信靠自己才是最好的方法，他人没有义务与你分担所有事务，因为能帮得了一时却不可能帮你一辈子的。任何事都必须靠自己才是上上之策。
所以“我到底要什么？”这问题也只有我自己才可能有答案。。
He planned to study in French universities next year and has yet to decide what he wanted to major in. I told him about my scholarship application and plan to continue applying for scholarships to Japan and Taiwan. Both of us agreed that if given a better choice, we would leave this job/company of ours.
One thing he said sort of made me thinking, "I have a job now, but I want a career..". Ah.. how apt his description of our current situation.. Yes, we both have a job that pays us every month, but we do not have a career.. Frankly, who in the IT line can truly say that they have a career?? Is being Project Manager a career? System Engineer? Programmer? Developer? What is the next step of being a System Engineer/Developer? Senior System Engineer/Developer? and then what? There is only so many managerial positions in a company, cos you cant have everyone being the manager, then who else will be doing the 'dirty' work?? Every year there are new graduates joining the work force, every year there are IT 'whizs' willing to work at a fraction of the pay but with twice the enthusiasm/effort. With IT outsourcing being the norm, with the influx of cheaper (and some say better) IT service providers from India and China, who wants to engage a local as a permanent IT staff?
Everyone wants to be the next manager, and most are willing to do anything to get it, including back-stabbing and bad-mouthing. 我不想卷入那些勾心斗角、抹黑 、奸诈、阿谀我诈的卑鄙行为。我自认没有高尚的品行，但还是有些事情我是决不会做的。要我说违背良心的奉承话语，对不起，我做不到。也许就因为这样我拒绝了两次晋升的机会，不是因为我能力不足，而是因为我不是搞办公室政治的能手，与其被他人当眼中钉或是在同事之中耍手段，我选择不参与，置身事外。也许你们会觉得我是在逃避，但我觉得自己还未到功夫，‘太极功夫’和‘耍赖神功’还欠缺火候，还必须闭门修炼才能在‘江湖’立足。也许不是我办不到，而是我不想办到。
老实说我现在似乎又再次失去了方向，工作的方向。我真的可以只要“job”而不需要“career”吗？曾经工作代表了我所有的身份，唯一的身份。而今我现在的身份到底是什么？人家的女儿？他人的姐姐？公司的职员？他人的好友？的确有一点迷惘了。我没有一个可以为自己定位的方针。。。我知道这是我必须解开的心结，只有我自己才能解决的难题。也许我太倔强太逞强了，什么事情都想一个人去解决处理，很少向他人求助或问意见，也许吧。。但我始终相信靠自己才是最好的方法，他人没有义务与你分担所有事务，因为能帮得了一时却不可能帮你一辈子的。任何事都必须靠自己才是上上之策。
所以“我到底要什么？”这问题也只有我自己才可能有答案。。
posted by imm @ 11:07 PM
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